Tuesday, November 10, 2009

The Car Accident

This weekend I found out that my best friends are getting a divorce. And the only way I can explain the situation is to liken it to watching a car accident.

I am joining the scene at the point when the driver can do no more. The momentum of the accident is in motion. All the chances for steering out of it, applying the brake, and downshifting are gone. The car is now in its own motion and all I can do is sit and hold my breath as I wait for it to go through the stages it will travel through-loss of control, impact, and then coming to rest.
I can only wait until the damage is done and then go to help the passengers pull themselves out of the wreckage and evaluate their injuries.

But I am resisting every urge I have to be the backseat driver and scream at the top of my lungs all of my suggestions to help avoid it-- despite the fact that the car is hydroplaning and at this point no amount of defensive driving will get those tires back on the ground in time to avoid the impending collision. And I'm thinking of the little boy who is asleep in the backseat with no knowledge of what is about to happen.

So its here that I wait on the side of the road. I am waiting for the crash, the smoke, the sound of crumpled steel. I wait for the bodies, broken and torn to emerge. I want to close my eyes but can't. I am standing there with my first aid kit....waiting....hoping it won't be as bad as I know it will be.

SO since I can't do anything, I will check on my own car today. I will check to see that I haven't missed any signs of danger in the road ahead, see if there is anything needing my attention, be sure my eyes are open and I am not missing anything that could cause a problem down the road. In other words, I'm calling my husband who is away on business this week and reminding him how much I love him.


Courtney on November 10, 2009 at 8:49 AM said...

Very well said, Jen!

A Little Of This And That on November 10, 2009 at 9:56 AM said...

Powerful post. As a sister to two divorced siiblings (both after 20 years of marriage), I know firsthand the carnage that follows a divorce... and the children have never recovered (here it is 7 and 10 years later), nor will they ever. They just limp through life as best they can. They hate divorce. They've told me so. I will pray for your friends... and for you.

Alyssa Barnett on November 10, 2009 at 12:55 PM said...

Wonderful post. It made me cry as I think of families I know torn apart from divorce. I can't help but pray for your friends even though I don't know them.
God bless.


The Scooper on November 10, 2009 at 3:17 PM said...

I went through this 2 years ago, our dearest couple friends...now divorced. The effects have been catastrophic. I felt all of the same emotions you expressed. In time, the severity of my own pain has lessened but the loss and sadness remain.

Sheila on November 10, 2009 at 5:17 PM said...

Aww, what a great post! Good explanation!
I hope everything works out ok. I'm sorry!

Kelli on November 10, 2009 at 10:41 PM said...

We have been there as well and watched our best friends go through this terrible ordeal!! Prayers!!

thegypsymama on November 10, 2009 at 10:52 PM said...

Oh, there is nothing as awful as watching that kind of wreck going down. We found out similar news a couple weeks ago and my reaction was like yours - I wanted to go find my husband immediately and hug him TIGHT!

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